She kept meaning to answer. She looked at it often, tried to think of something. Make a decision, damn it! It agitated her, how she left it hanging, this equivocating, this sexual pandora’s box. She didn’t dare open it. But there he was, always there, always waiting. It might have dragged on like that, endlessly, this standoff. Who knows? But fate would take Leila in another direction. Two more weeks passed, then one Saturday a girl friend invited Leila to bring her kids and spend an afternoon. ” Damon said in a hard voice cutting him off.“Dude, I’m…”“Are you deaf or something?” Damon bellowed. “I said I didn’t want to talk about it. It was a mistake. Forget it ever happened.”Tristan felt his chest tighten. He felt a physical pain inside his chest. What the fuck was happening to him? He took a deep breath. Then abruptly turned on his heels and walked out of Damon’s office. He wasn’t about to stand there for a second more and disgrace himself. Because for the life of him, he didn’t. The following week I walked slowly past Mary Hall on the way to and from class hoping I’d run into Nico, even walking out of my way whenever I had time. I had her panties which I had found balled up under the edge of my bed and I carried them with me like I was the prince in a perverted version of Cinderella. Not once did I get a glimpse of her. I slept with the shirt I had worn that night. I hadn’t washed it and I could still smell her on it.After two weeks I had almost given up seeing her. It was your immaturity that ultimately caused the problem. Granted, Becky pushed you too hard for a permanent situation, but if she hadn’t done that? You two would probably be engaged about now. Don’t mistake how she acted after the forced abortion, for how she would have been if she’d had your baby, or if you had never broken up.”“Are you serious Jennifer? Me and Becky?”“Think back Steve. You loved her. In fact, you loved her enough to make love to her, knowing what would happen between you.
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